my heart goes out to my friend today.
he called and i could hear it in his voice, it hurts. i can almost feel my heart breaking. i could hear his heart breaking too but the music is so loud he can't hear it. he told me he missed me and that he loved me and i told him that I haven't gone anywhere.
i am so vain sometimes; always assuming that about 5 minutes after i stop doing something, that it goes immediately out of style. apparently people are doing cocaine again. sad. it hadn't occurred to me that with 80's fashion coming back, that perhaps the drugs would come back too. a lot of my old friends are dead. i loved them. they died a long time ago and i grieved a long time ago too, but today i am feeling it all over again and i don't like it. i would have liked to see what 30 something would have been like for them.
i want to play music to touch people, heal them, to give them an experience, to show them how much i love them and that they can do it too~that's why i'm there.
and because i have to.